REASON FOR RISE TO STARDOM
     Kept Getting Banned On Open Mic Nights
REAL NAME
    Alexander Chepovetsky
BIRTHPLACE
     Kiev, Ukraine
BIRTHDATE
    May 22, 1975
ZODIAC SIGN
     Gemini
NATIONALITY
    Russian, Ukrainian
RELIGION
    Jewish (non-practicing)
CURRENT RESIDENCE
     East Brunswick,NJ
HAIR
    Long brown wavy with highlights
EYES
    Hazel
HEIGHT 
    5'11''
WEIGHT
    145lbs.
PIERCINGS
    Ears, Tongue
CAR
    1996 Nissan Sentra
CELEB WOULD MOST LIKE TO MEET
     Alicia Silverstone
SEX FACT
     Still a virgin at 28

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 Sample poems;

"Bowling With Jailbait" by Alexander The Poet 11/02/02

How I love to go bowling
And seeing lots of jailbait
To see them all maturing
For this I anxiously wait

They know how to grab the balls
They know how to do it well
Meanwhile I stare at them all
And I'm sure they all can tell

When they are ready to throw
I get a nice view of ass
My penis begins to grow
It begins to grow real fast

I'm glad when they get a strike
Because they jump up and down
I see boobs bounce which I like
How I want to go to town

I never knew that bowling
Could be oh so forbidden
Which is why I keep going,
For the underage women

THE END

"Ode To Uncle Ben's Rice" by Alexander The Poet 

This poem's about a negro,
Who grew a lot of rice
And for that, we all thank him so,
Uncle Ben, was so nice!

Uncle Ben grew up in Texas,
And grow the rice, he did
A lot of time did seem to pass,
From when, he was a kid

The rice became so popular,
Throughout, San Francisco
It was picked up quick, by gaydar,
And loved by each homo

But Uncle Ben was a great man,
His rice speaks, for itself!
His rice, pleases fags in San Fran,
It sells out, on each shelf!

THE END

  Confused with Rice-a Roni?

"Hairy Ass European Women" by Alexander The Poet 

When I think of European girls,
I think of a lot of hair
It may make most of you people hurl,
But not me, I came from there!

European girls are exotic,
They are so open and free
I'm sure they would even suck my dick,
Unlike girls, in this country!

Yeah I know they all don't shave down there,
You see, I can deal with it
Because it helps me get to know where,
Get to know where, is the clit!

So to all the hairy ass bitches,
I am here waiting for you
With roses, wine, and my two inches,
And a good lawn mower too!

THE END